Late last week I went to the place where they sell topsoil and bark. Normally I would have placed an order over the phone, but instead, I drove out there so I could make sure I was ordering exactly what I wanted. You know, not that horrible neon orange bark you see in everyone’s yard when you drive through suburbia.
The only problem was, it was raining heavily when I was out there and it was kind of hard to tell which variety I was suppose to order.
I mean, wet bark looks totally different than dry bark, right? Right?
Now maybe you live in a town where you can get bark for free. Or you know someone with a wood chipper, or your local road crew will deliver it to your house for a small fee after clearing brush and downed trees. Sadly, I do not live in such a place.
I have to buy my bark to keep my yard looking like everyone else’s. A lot of the neighbors use a bark blowing service. So I called the guy and basically he said I needed 75 yards of bark and that he was going to charge an arm and a leg. I thought he was crazy. So I politely declined his professional opinion and will now be spreading my own bark thank you very much. I think I only need 30 yards, he says 75, so we’ll see.
The only problem is, I ordered the WRONG FREAKIN’ SHADE OF BARK.
It may not look like it now, but just you wait. I’ll be posting my backyard garden tour pictures this afternoon, and you are going to pee your pants it’s so awful.
And there is nothing I can do about it either.
Now I’m stuck with this neon orange crap because I couldn’t exactly ask the guy with the big truck to shovel it back in his truck once I realized I had made a MAJOR ERROR.
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